Paris in the Rain - Sister Beck's Weekly Update

 Hola Hola 🌾

I had such a cool experience on Tuesday!! We were on a phone call with this guy named Luciano. He is super nice but pretty quickly into the call he told us that the Book of Mormon wasn't convincing to him (he looked up anti💀) and that he doesn't believe we need anything more than the Bible (classic) Hna Gonzalez is a great teacher and was explaining it to him really well but he still wasn't "buying it" 🙃 

I had the thought to whip out 2 Nephi 29 but that one can be a little too intense for people but both my comps were like "idk what else to do" so I read it, verses 7-9. I related to him and explained that those verses opened my eyes to better understanding. 

There was a long pause after and I was like "daaaaaaaaaannggg I blew it" Then he goes: Bien.. ¿cómo obtengo una copia para estudiar realmente? 🤯🤯😳😲😲🤠🤠 all of us just looked at each other in disbelief. He was ready to call it quits but thanks to THE POWER OF THE SCRIPTURES HE DIDNT EVEN BELIEVE IN his heart was softened. Isn't the Book of Mormon just the BEST!

My favorite Spanish accents so far are: Colombian, Venezuelan, and Mexican Spanish. I like those because 1. They sound the nicest to me and 2. They're easier to understand for me. 

I started sending gifs to our amigos because why not and it has unleashed a side of them that I enjoy beaucoup. I'll put a few of their responses below "jijijiji". 

Hermana Gonzalez's birthday was on Saturday and you all already know how I feel about birthdays 😊🥳 so I decorated our living room with our low budget supplies and I got her a minion cake 😂 

For the first time on my mission I kind of feel like God has kept quiet. Me and God have been pretty tight especially since I've been out, and I've received revelation and comfort and all that good stuff in ways I haven't ever before. He's been my best therapist and my closest friend. But for some reason it feels like he's closed the communication channel. I have a hard time feeling anything in my prayers. I get mixed signals (which I KNOW aren't from God because "God doesn't play games" -my dad) 

It's hard 🤷🏼‍♀️ I find myself saying that a lot lately. 

I know He's there. I know there's divine purpose behind this silence. But I'd be lying if I said I didn't miss and wasn't desperate to feel close to Him again. 

And maybe He is trying to tell me something but I'm not ready to hear it or act on it. 

No matter the case, I'll keep going, I'll keep trusting. 

My companions and I started talking about it one night, and one of them straight up told me she thinks that I have a lot of pride and also a lot of fear. At first I was like: chilllllll. 

And at first it did stir some unpleasant feelings.

But then I sat there and thought about it. And it's true 🤷🏼‍♀️ 

I am too prideful and I don't want to look dumb in front of people. My pride has held me back from fully immersing myself in the language. Saying what I actually want to say, even if the person on the other end doesn't love the way it sounds. 

I even hesitated putting this in my email cause I was like: "I DoNt WaNt pEoPlE tO tHiNk iM PrIdEfUl" which that in itself is ~p r i d e f u l ~ but its just the truth. 

I'm afraid of saying the wrong things and "ruining" things but I also have a bunch of pride because I don't want to sound dumb, especially when I speak in another language. 

There's a lot more to it all but essentially that's what it comes down to. 

So that's my next "mission self mastery project" is to get rid of pride and fear. If any of this hits a little too close to home maybe you can join me in getting rid of that orgullo too. 

As always, im open to counsel and advice from you guys :) 

HAPPY BIRTHDAY (TODAY) KARTER, KAITLYNN, JACKSON, JENNA (25), AND LILLY(26) 🥳🥳🥳 I LOVE YOU GUYSSSS 

Love yall 

Bye! 

I FINALLY SAW THE ARC DE TRIOMPHE !! Its so so cool ! No one told me that I had to walk up the whole arc tho to get to the toP Hahaha I LOVE PARIS 😁😁